I have always had a love/hate relationship with the Cosby show. I went through times of watching it all the time to vowing to never watch it again.
During the times I would watch it all the time they seemed so perfect. I wanted this kind of family so badly. From the outside looking in we looked like them.
My Dad the Baptist preacher and my Mom the homemaker. Everybody loved them. They were doing God's work raising 6 foster kids with very little help. We lived in a 6-bedroom house in a very "nice" neighborhood.
During the time I was vowing to never watch it again I felt betrayed by it. I felt I was being sold a dream. I believed that what they had did not exist for anyone. Even though my family looked like them to the outside world it was not what I was experiencing.
I had a Dad that was so much like Cosby but not quite. My Dad was Cosby if Cosby did all the same things he did on the show and was also molesting the kids. I would beg my Dad all the time to be the kind of Dad Cosby was. I would say "Why can't you just be a regular normal Dad, like that? Without all the perv stuff?" He would try so hard and for the most part he succeeded but eventually he would not be able to stop the part of him that was a pervert. At least back then I thought he was really trying. Maybe he never really did try to not be a pervert. Maybe two weeks would go by and then I would wake up to him feeling me up while he jacked off. I rarely got a good night sleep.
Now that Cosby has been convicted of sexual assault I realize I had what I had been asking for all along. My Dad was just like him after all.